Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Almost there...

The past few days in Naples have been really great, making it very hard for me to think about leaving.  Why are things always better in the end?  Who knows...

Saturday I joined the family as we went out and around town.  We took a drive through the city center, and then drove up to a bar near Mergellina for a drink and some beautiful views of the sea.  Afterwards, we went to Bruno's parents house and had lunch, the girls took a nap, and we relaxed and talked.  From there we went to Rosa's mom's house for the evening, where we talked and relaxed more and the girls had dinner.

Sunday we had a nice lunch here at the house, and I realized it was my last Sunday here.  We talked a little bit about my year here and had some good laughs, and Bruno told me that I was the best Au Pair they've had.  He made me and Rosa cry!  Bruno is a man of few words, but when he says something, he really means it, and you really listen.  It really meant a lot coming from him.  Sunday evening Lucia and Marco picked me up and we met up with some friends for a drink.  It was a great way to say goodbye to some of the people I've met here!

Monday I took my suitcases out and started organizing my clothes and all of my stuff to be packed.  I've acquired a LOT of stuff during my year here...books, clothes, other random things.  Bruno bought some Limoncello for parents that I needed to wrap up and pack, I needed to do some laundry, etc.  So slowly I've been filling up my suitcases.  I'm pretty much all packed, except for a few basic things that I will need for the rest of the week.  The girls got a little upset when they saw all my stuff packed away but we've been talking to them about the situation and working through it.

Yesterday (Tuesday) was Vittoria's 3rd birthday!  She already seems so much older!  She's still staying home from school because of the chicken pox, but will be going back very soon.  Last night I was invited to Marco's house for dinner and a movie and had an amazing time.  Lucia's parents dropped her and I off, and I got to meet Marco's parents and his twin brother, Francesco.  I had a great time talking with them in a wonderful bilingual conversation!  Marco loves to play host and is really great at that sort of thing, so he had the table beautifully set for eight people.  The other four showed up a little while later and we sat down to a wonderful dinner of pasta, meat, vegetables, fruit, bread, lots of wine, and ice cream to finish it all off!  It was a great dinner with great conversation with great people.  After dinner we all talked and then watched 'The Holiday' (which, thankfully, I've seen before, because we watched it in Italian!).  Marco presented me with a copy of a book his father wrote about the loss of their sister to cancer.  It's a beautiful book and I can't way to work on reading it!  It was such a thoughtful gift.  At the end of the night Marco drove me and Lucia home, and I was very sad to say goodbye to him.  I have him a big hug and thanked him for everything; my experience here in Naples wouldn't have been the same without him.  When I got inside I jumped on the computer (although it was 2am) and saw my mom was online so started chatting with her.  I got very emotional...I was so happy that I had such a nice evening and couldn't believe that it was the last one I would have.

I've been very emotional the past couple of days, thinking about everything I'm going to be leaving behind.  I've talked to my parents and friends about it but nobody seems to understand.  Unless you've traveled the world yourself, you have no idea what it's like.  The experiences you have change you...and when you go home...nothing is the same, yet everything is the same.  I already know it will be a very tough adjustment to me.  I've been reading up on reverse culture shock and ways to handle it.  Some people can adjust easily, others can't.  The minute my brother got home from Iraq he was going through the Bojangles drivethru; I cried the first time I went to our local mall after moving back home from my amazing freshman year of college.  I'm just the type of person that gets really, REALLY, deeply affected by things.  But I guess it's those types of things that make you who you are.  After I graduated high school I thought I was so 'grown'...and then I went off to college, had an amazing first year, and was really changed when I moved home the next summer.  After I graduated college, I thought I was really grown up, and then I came here to Italy and have changed immensely.  My only hope is that I continue to grow and change into the woman I want to become, and not regress back into the girl I was in college.  I think it will help a lot that I will be living with my parents, who support me unconditionally and act as the greatest cushions for me to fall on when times get hard.  I'll be close enough to Wilmington to see all my friends and do all the things I want to do, yet far enough away to where I don't get caught up in the scene I was a part of throughout my four years at UNCW.  Besides the reverse culture shock, I honestly just don't know how I can get by without hugs and kisses from my baby girls everyday.  I've been all over them lately, not wanting to let them go, because I don't want to forget how it feels to hold them in my arms.  Even though I know I will seem them again, it will never be the same...

Deep breaths...


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